S-T-R-E-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S

so as always when things look up for me they tend to come down rather hard. Things aren't as down as they usually go yet but things are getting pretty stressful. So i realized that there is about a week or two before the quarter ends and i feel like im not doing as well as i should in most of my classes (yes yes that is my fault entirely but still it is a cause of stress). We are all feeling pretty stressed at home and as always this kinda makes things kinda tense. My mother now has bell's palsy so that is one more thing we have to worry about, i was asked to resign from my job due to my class schedule, i have a ton of work i need to do for my classes. i need to do a drastic overhaul on my room because as always another aspect of my life not up to par for my parents standards. then in the midst of all this i keep hearing the last things my ex said over and over again. and this simple fact is starting to really fuck with my mind. then the current love interest has some medical problems with a stomach and or pancreas that hates him who is having tests done on monday so maybe the doctors will finally have some answers for him...and as we speak right now he is having a root canal.. ouch babe!... but yea i tend to be a procrastinating perfectionist to some extent which doesn't make sense but yea. i constantly feel the need to please everyone and be the perfect friend and when i let people down i take it a lot harder than i should so this whole job thing is starting to get to me. i mean i really got attached the the kids at work and im going to miss them tremendously but yet there is nothing i can do just one of those things. so with all the things sprinting in my mind at the moment i find myself to be falling in a lil depression and im starting to feel so lost and lonely. i don't exactly know it has to do specifically with my stress or just a varying myriad of emotions. which oddly happens from time to time... i will get these random periods of depression and they usually last for a bit but then eventually they go away ...haha i think that is a disorder but oh wellz i think it would be to much to expect of my parents to even acknowledge my feelings so nothing i can really do about that. i just want to see my light at the end of the tunnel...i just want to be rescued...i just want to stop feeling that im constantly disappointing people.... it is almost a constant fear that in some aspects is taking over... Please God deliver me from evil and help me rise up out of this feeling of loneliness and wondering i have been feeling....